On kids and the Bible

A frustrating thing for me right now is:  Bible Stories. (Yes, my life is simple)  Seriously, Elena picks the weirdest stories to fall in love with.  If they weren’t Bible stories, you can bet your life I would say something like “That is such a silly and pointless story, sorry kiddo, not going to read it to you.” 

Since you can’t do that with Stories of the Good Book, I just swallow and read over and over the grim tail of Samson, how he went on a killing spree,  and his head got shaved, his eyes got gouged out, and then the happy ending  in which he pushes over the pillars and kills everyone.  Just lovely. 

On the last page there are pictures of terrified people running down the temple steps while the walls are crumbling down.  Elena always asks about these people and what they’re doing, and where they’re going.  And I say “Oh they’re just getting killed.  Samson was filled with the Holy Spirit so he could kill all the people.”  If nothing else it’s caused me to pull out the Bible and read the story of Samson over and over and try to find meaning in it.

Is it weird to anyone that the same God would fill someone with the Spirit and cause him to do something, that if done today, we would point to it as an obvious lack of the Spirit?  Anyone follow?

And as far as teaching my kids theology, I think they are seriously going to be messed up.  First off, I used that wonderful old cliché.  “Jesus is in our hearts”.  So of course Elena wants to know what he’s doing in there.  So when I used that phrase immediately I was all annoyed at myself, so I made it worse by saying “Oh, he’s probably just playing baseball in there”. (I know, can you be a worse parent? I’m thinking of erasing this since it reflects badly on me.  Oh well, I’ll keep it real.)

Tonight Elena goes:  “Jesus is playing in my heart.  But what is God doing?”
Me: “He’s in your heart too. I guess. Well actually, I don’t know.”
Elena: “What’s he doing in my heart?”
Me: “I don’t know.”
Elena: “I guess he’s working on the computer in my heart.” 

Yup, kid that works for me.  Theology?  I’m sure she’ll teach me more than I teach her.


6 thoughts on “On kids and the Bible

  1. I know what you mean about some of the Bible Stories. One of my kids’ favorite is David and Goliath. How in the world do you explain the part about David cutting off Goliath’s head and then taking it and bringing it to the people??? I mean, that is just gross! We haven’t gotten to the Samsom story yet. Maybe I’ll just kinda by-pass that one.

  2.  So cute but I can see were she leaves you stumped! The bible can be so R rated!
     And I follow on the “obvious lack of the spirit”, guess that’s why we need to leave the judging up to God. Our tiny brains always see what is done in action “losing focus on the heart” and judge upon it…

  3. i’ve stuggled with the “jesus living in my heart’, thing too.  kids just don’t get that,  the first time i told taht to tianna she promply said “i don’t want Jesus in my heart”,  so i left it at that.   have a good week! 

  4. that is f-u-n-n-y! what a silly kid! madi was worried one night that the food she ate was going to get all over Jesus. i guess i didn’t explain it very well. it’s been good for me to try out fresh and meaningful descriptions for my kids. and the whole thing with the God of the ot is quite intreaguing to me right now. i just got done reading exedus-numbers and i know that He is the same God back then i am just not sure what to think. like He didn’t seem to really consider what was in people’s hearts and He was so quick to get mad and wanted to annihilate His people a couple of times! hmmm. makes me feel so good about having Jesus on my side. not that i don’t love God… i think i am gaining a better respect for Him. anyway…. blah, blah…

  5. That is funny!  My oldest decided they did not have towels in Israel, because Mary wiped Jesus’ feet with her hair.  I told him to continue reading and he will see that Jesus wrapped a towel around His waist.Oh, if you see my foot prints and want to pop by, I am on Friend’s Lock for the time being.  Just send me an invite if you are interested.  :)Kim

  6. 🙂 Too funny. I don’t think Madison thinks very deep cause she’s never come up with this stuff yet. 🙂 Imagine the theology Elena’s gonna be able to pull off when she’s 25! 🙂

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