Esh vs Mullet

A recurring (and recurring and recurring) conversation that we (Gene & I) have is the difference of our families.  Really they are just so different.  Can you identify with this?

For instance, food is important to my family, but it’s more of an afterthought to Gene’s family.

 During Christmas this year, Gene’s family went Christmas Caroling together.  My family would refuse to attempt anything of that sort.

The Mullets would sniff at perpetual lateness.  Eshs are guilty of it.
The Eshs would sniff at being interested in pop culture and movies.  Mullets are guilty.

Esh vs Mullet

On Eating out:

Esh Conversation:
Where did you go?
Red Lobster

Mullet Conversation:
Where did you go?
Red Lobster
What did you get?
The Cod
Was it good?
It was dry, so I wish I would have gotten the mahi-mahi, which is usually suburb.  Next time I think I’ll ask them to braise it.


Conversation at the 6:00 meeting time:
Person #1 Not everybody is here yet, I’m going to go get gas, the rest of you can catch up to me.
Person #2 Since he left already, I’m needing my charger, so I’m going to run and get it.
Person #3 Can I catch a ride with you while you go get your charger, than you can drop me off at the grocery store, which is by the gas station, then I will run over to the gas station and catch up with the rest of you later.  
Person #4 Ok, CHANGE OF PLANS!!, everybody meet at the grocery store in a half an hour.
Person #5 NO, why the grocery store?  We need to meet at the Gas Station in a half an hour.
(1hr later and half the people are at the gas station and the other half are at the grocery store)

(There is no conversation, because everybody already left at 5:55)

On Grilling:
Person #1 The burgers are done

Person#1 Do you have a stop watch? It says to flash-fry for only 30 seconds per side.
Person #2 Yes, I have a stop watch, “quick flip it!”
Person#1 Oh no, the smoker is cooling down, what we need is some air movement, Go get a hair dryer, we need to heat this baby up.
Person#3 Got the hairdryer running, it’s just what we need. Just 3.5 seconds until you need to flip the steaks.
^^^That is not even hypothetical, it actually happened.  A bunch of men hovering over a smoker with a stopwatch, and a hairdryer)


On Reducing, Reusing, and Recycling
No need to call the repair man. I think I have some fan belts from 1976 in the garage.
I have color-coded recycling bins in my garage with for cans, bottles, and boxes.

On Beverages:
Person #1 I’m thirsty
Person #2 Here’s water.

Person #1 I’m thirsty
Person #2 Would you like Coke, Diet Coke, Diet Caffeine Free Coke, Sprite, Mountain Dew, Sierra Mist, Diet Rootbear, Sparkling water, Orange Juice, Apple Juice, Grape Juice, Acai-Cran juice or Water?

Boy, poking fun at our families is awfully enjoyable.  There are ways that they’re similar but those aren’t fun to talk about.    There is much more that could be written about what makes them great.   What’s really neat is that we can take the quirks, the cool traits, the weird oddities, and make our very own brand of Esh-Mullet for our own family.

17 thoughts on “Esh vs Mullet

  1. Totally lol!!! I should do one like this on Hostetler vs Stoll!! Honestly, I don’t think there are more incompatible families then what we came from!! I love the time one! That is totally our predicament! When we were kids it took 20 min to drive to church. At 8:45 Dad was in the van blowing the horn! It took Eric 5 min to get to church at at 9:35 he left. Imagine our life now! Enough said. 🙂 

  2. Different indeed!!  The Kings vs Petersheims would be an interesting list!  It’s bad enough between just Floyd & Wilma and the differences there!!  :)Thanks for the chuckle!

  3. could you pleeaase write more family quirks? this was by far the highlight of my reading this morning!! i love love discussing differences in families.  of course, i always think my family is just a bit better. because i “GET”  it, you know. the food thing is so us. Weldon had never eaten a real juicy beef steak before we met. i didn’t know ppl served only water for breakfast!

  4. oh my!! i SO get this!! however if I would write something of the sort it would prly sound more hurtful and less humerous…or someone would take it as hurtful even though it was meant to be humerous (right there, classic his family (sensitive, easily hurt) vs. mine (bah-ha-ha laugh over anything)  this was my morning delight anyway

  5. I was going to comment yesterday that I LOVE that you are writing more.  I will do it now. And you are going to blog tomorrow and the next day too…Yay! Keep it up. I love what you write!This is so hilarious!  Loved the one about the 6 PM meeting time.  I have to say, your family sounds a lot like mine.  In many ways. Being on time. Over-discussing every little thing.  Loving food.Anyway…fun, fun read.  I would have not minded if you would have kept going longer either. You could just continue tomorrow!?

  6. This is SO funny! And I so get it, because my husband and I come from POLAR-OPPOSITE families too. Sometimes I think if we’d have known how differently we were raised we would never have thought we’re compatible. :))

  7. Very interesting! We too, mixed up some real family differences when we tied the knot. Makes life interesting. I like to think I’ve become a bit more laid backed, and perhaps he’s a bit more scheduled. “Be thou balanced” my hubs always says.

  8. this post makes me laugh, but don’t think i will attempt it. and the reason behind not attempting it all has to do with the troyer vs. schrock.  one side would think it was funny and the other family would be offended to no end!

  9. LOVE! it makes me miss that quirky mullet family. the beverage selections, the bustle in the kitchen to get everything just right, the politics and current events… funny family!

  10. once again. I LOVE YOUR POSTS!!!!!!!!!! this one is no exception!!! just for the record, not all Esh families are like the Eshes you described 🙂 just sayin.

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