Month: March 2008

On kids and the Bible

.Reading time 3 minutes.


A frustrating thing for me right now is:  Bible Stories. (Yes, my life is simple)  Seriously, Elena picks the weirdest stories to fall in love with.  If they weren’t Bible stories, you can bet your life I would say something like “That is such a silly and pointless story, sorry kiddo, not going to read it to you.” 

Since you can’t do that with Stories of the Good Book, I just swallow and read over and over the grim tail of Samson, how he went on a killing spree,  and his head got shaved, his eyes got gouged out, and then the happy ending  in which he pushes over the pillars and kills everyone.  Just lovely. 

On the last page there are pictures of terrified people running down the temple steps while the walls are crumbling down.  Elena always asks about these people and what they’re doing, and where they’re going.  And I say “Oh they’re just getting killed.  Samson was filled with the Holy Spirit so he could kill all the people.”  If nothing else it’s caused me to pull out the Bible and read the story of Samson over and over and try to find meaning in it.

Is it weird to anyone that the same God would fill someone with the Spirit and cause him to do something, that if done today, we would point to it as an obvious lack of the Spirit?  Anyone follow?

And as far as teaching my kids theology, I think they are seriously going to be messed up.  First off, I used that wonderful old cliché.  “Jesus is in our hearts”.  So of course Elena wants to know what he’s doing in there.  So when I used that phrase immediately I was all annoyed at myself, so I made it worse by saying “Oh, he’s probably just playing baseball in there”. (I know, can you be a worse parent? I’m thinking of erasing this since it reflects badly on me.  Oh well, I’ll keep it real.)

Tonight Elena goes:  “Jesus is playing in my heart.  But what is God doing?”
Me: “He’s in your heart too. I guess. Well actually, I don’t know.”
Elena: “What’s he doing in my heart?”
Me: “I don’t know.”
Elena: “I guess he’s working on the computer in my heart.” 

Yup, kid that works for me.  Theology?  I’m sure she’ll teach me more than I teach her.

 

.Reading time 3 minutes.

   The water on our farm is contaminated. It has been for about a year. Don’t worry; the DEP is all over it. (ummm…. Department of Environmental Protection) Now if you want to know more knitty-gritty details about the what/why/how of the contamination you’ll have to message me, because I’m not all about the details.

      ANYWAY they (the DEP) drilled a well in our field to test the water every so often. The other week they came to my front door and needed to find their way to the well to take a sample. I told them how to get through the fenced area in the field, we chatted a bit. I was all jokey and talkative and then told them that in the future, they can just go directly to the well, they don’t need to come to the house and tell me that they’re here. 

      As they were leaving I was thinking to myself.  “I’m so getting into this farm thing. I am such a knowledgeable and experienced farm wife.”  It just felt so good not to have to call Gene and ask him “Now where is that well the DEP drilled?” 

      Fast-forward to today when Gene calls me with panic in his voice “Someone called me that the DEP is in the field. That’s the field where the mad bull is.”

      Oh duh. I knew that. That bull is like dangerously mad. I called him The Killer. So as I’m imagining mangled bodies hanging over the fence, blood soaking into the ground, and headlines screaming Four Killed Due to Farm Wife Negligence, I rush out to tell these people that their lives are hanging in the balance. And GET OUT OF THIS FIELD RIGHT NOW.

      Someday when I get it right, I’ll be sure to tell you all about it.

So today I’m cleaning up my compute (deleting files, add ware, viruses etc) and I found this all typed up, ready to post on xanga, but I had forgotten to do so. It all happened about six months ago. I popped it in here; because I didn’t post this week anyway. 

We sold the bull soon after, due to his penchant for attacking people.
Have a good weekend, you all!